[ There is not anyone else she allows this close other than Angel. She doesn't know how it all started. Lulled into a false sense of security around her discussing books and trying to get her out of shitty romance novels (while buying her the worst harlequin romances she happens to find in bargain stands). It was a friendship that just happened.
And then she ended up catching herself laying on Angel's lap when they were out on the park and liking way too much her fingers in her hair. And her presence in her studio. And generally just being around her.
And it really is not fair when she is like that, because Parker is far too weak for it. She knows there isn't a fully sober decision from her right now, but for a split second, she tilts her head for Angel to have an easier access as her lips mark her skin with lipstick. Takes all of her strength to just stand there quietly, fingers gripping into the counter, biting her lower lip.
The microwave pings, and Parker opens her eyes slowly, leaning back to watch Angel. She is glad the apartment is a little too dark so she can hide her face in it. Her leg bumps gently against Angel's, skin on skin, one warmer than the other. Her voice is soft and small. ]
[ She's eager with the mess she wakes. Bracing her hands on her hips, rocking on the far too tall heels. Rolling her weight easily as she presses against her. ]
Saying thank you. I don't want you to think I'm not grateful.
[ Her head goes lower, all sweetly teasing along her collar-bone until she bites, sharp and quick and giggling. The soft press of her tongue against skin and the roll up and into her. There are goosebumps on her skin with the cold, her pale skin stark against the sheer black of her bra. More lace - she seems to have endless amounts of it and - she looks happy to taking it off too up until - ]
Pizza's done. [ and she's gone the next second, going straight to the microwave to get it open. Hungry, is apparently what's taking up the other part of her mind. ]
[ She is far too easy to it. Should stop her, but-- Damn it. Likes a little too much, the feeling of being pushed and pinned against the counter, the hips under Angel's hands rising slightly as she rocks into her and she is not clothed enough for this, the red sweater riding up her thighs, as she does. The fabric too thin and pressed too tight against her chest to properly hide the way her body reacts to the kisses and-- she holds her breath at the bite, eyes fluttering close. Half-swallows a gasp when she rolls against her again, going red as she feels herself grow eager with the warmth that pushes down in her belly.
It's one thing, hugs and sleeping with her head buried against her chest and craving for her fingers in her hair. It's another to feel a pleasant hot pulse between her legs from kisses and bites.
Parker gasps at the sudden distance, knuckles turned white from the sheer strength she had been holding on to the counter. Swallows dryly as Angel moves away, left a bit of a mess. Stares at her with half-open mouth, before hurrying in crossing her arms over her chest in embarrassment.
Shit. Not good. ]
Uhm. Yeah. Enjoy.
[ Parker is just going stand there not moving for a moment. ]
[ She intends to. Her nails are delicate and manicured white and she's dainty as she picks up the pizza, hot in her fingers - but less so as she takes a big bite. Tugging at it with her teeth like a wolf might at its prey. Yanking it, then chewing it quickly. Won't be long until the pizza is gone as she walks, slowly, deliberately, toward's Parker's bed.
Turning back to her, she's sucking off the oil from her thumb in a slow gesture. Catching her eye with it. A warm lick against her own lips. ]
[ Parker knows she is not sober, and it's the only thing holding her back. She also knows she's not drunk to the point of not knowing what she is doing, which is why she isn't knocking her out cold. Parker chews on her bottom lip nervously, thumb rubbing up and down against her scar.
She does smile a little watching Angel eat, because it's her favourite kind and she has stopped ordering any other nowadays. Keeps it saved in the fridge for her and her late night visits. Not so big of a smile when she moves away and has to try very hard to not to lower her eyes to the skirt that's more a belt than a skirt. Attempts to. Doesn't really go all too well.
She straightens up as Angel walks to the bed and has to force herself to pretend she's not seeing what she's seeing or how adorable her lace always is (she thinks she has seen that before, one off-handed remark when they were shopping, telling her it would look good on her) and shrugs. ]
Just an essay. [ She finally pushes herself off the counter to the bed, tugging at the covers to make it more inviting. ] You done with yours?
[ She finishes it quickly. Stuffing it in her face until it's all gone and shrugs to the question. ]
No. Who cares though? I can finish it in the morning.
[ because she's smart, she knows she's smart, she's smarter than half the people she talks to and she worked that out young. An essay would take her a couple of hours, tops. Not that she didn't take it seriously, but it's hard to care about a course that Jack had picked for her. ]
[ Of course. Parker can't help to roll her eyes a little at her blase attitude about essays. She knows she's capable of whipping them out like it's the easiest thing to do in the world. And in any case, she's big enough to make her own decisions. Unfortunately, most essays for Parker require extensive research so she tends to do them as soon as possible. ]
I don't doubt it.
[ She sits down on the bed again, rubbing her eyes tiredly. Less tired than she was before Angel came knocking though. Maybe if she forces some sleep on herself she'll forget the warmth in her belly. ]
[ With the plate set aside, she leans back with a flick of her hair then and it's not comfortable so much as it's purposeful in the dim light of Parker's apartment. Bracing her arms behind her, to push her chest up just so. One leg crossing in front of the other in a way that's too slow to be anything but deliberate. Bares the garter belt holding her stockings up with the movement, the bit of skin above that where the barely bit of skirt bunches at the top of her thighs.
All preening, demanding, expecting. ]
No. [ the red smear of lipstick at the corner of her mouth, and shiver of cold on her skin that wants to be warmed away. ] Just you.
[ It's getting more and more difficult to ignore the very not subtle signs and Parker wishes she could go with it. In theory, she could, but she won't, because it isn't right and it isn't fair - for either of them. Parker swallows dryly, before sighing and pushing her feet to the floor.
She opens a drawer from a cupboard, pulls out a clean workout shirt, large and comfortable, and walks back to Angel. ]
Okay. [ Like she's saying yes to her request. She kneels in front of her, setting the shirt on Angel's lap, and starts to undo the heels from her. ] You need sleep.
[ She bites her lip, and it's got nothing at all to do with sleep. Lifting her leg up Parker and for one second she's happy to let her do her heels. Stretching out against her hold. The second it comes off though, she hooks her leg over Parker's shoulder in order to tug her close. Up against her like she's looking to draw her in for more than just that. ]
I like it when you make me tired.
[ She wiggles her toes inside her stockings against Parker's shoulder. Her leg arching up in a way that's nothing but inviting. ]
[ At first, she thought she was going to finally give in and let her help her out. Easily untying the heels, careful as she peels it off, one hand holding her calf. Until she hooks her leg over her shoulder and tugs her forward and Parker nearly falls from it, one hand bracing against the bed. She looks up to her, heart skipping a little, and sighs, focusing very intensely on Angel's face and not anywhere else.
Which is hard to do. ]
You don't know what you're saying.
[ And it's harder and harder for Parker to peel away from her, but she has to. She wishes she did know what she was saying, and everything would be so much easier. Doesn't help that Angel's leg is resting on her shoulder, or that she's wearing that short skirt or the pretty lacy bra. ]
[ It's an admirable effort. Really, maybe if she were more sober she'd appreciate it - but she isn't. She's too many glasses deep, and want she wants is to revel in how warm Parker is, the curve of her mouth, the softness of her skin. ]
Don't I?
[ She wriggles closer. Squirming up against her that's the invitation of the cheap perfume and cigarettes and thick smell of alcohol. Her, all warm, all giving she'll be nothing but pliant and giving and - if Parker would just reach a little closer, it's all hers. ]
[ Parker pushes herself up on her knees, carefully removing the thigh from her shoulder. She's cold, she's warm, she's demanding and bossy and she's giving and gentle. And she wants all of it, god, she does, but she can't. ]
No. [ She gently sets her hands on her sides, keeping her steady. Her skin is warmer than Angel's by far and she automatically spreads her fingers to try to warm her up. Presses her shoulders against hers, keeping her close. Slips her arms around her waist then, fingers against the shoulder blades as she noses her shoulder shyly. ] And I can't because I want you to know.
[ She's less than helpful, doesn't seem to hear her rejections of Angel's brilliant little ideas and there's something unguarded to it, to her. No face up for expectations. Just her and her naked want written on her face as her eyes shut.
Rather as Parker's fingers work up, her head goes back in open invitation. The exposed line of her body that she can feel the slide of her hands on her bare skin that leaves her toes curling up at how good that feels. The moan is guiltless, honest, when it works it's way up her body. Responding to tone more than words that say that this isn't happening.
When she blinks her eyes open, they're dazed with it, heavy-lidded that says just to how much she is getting further and further gone. Either to being touched or to the drink, either way. One makes the other easy. ]
[ Parker breathes out slowly against her naked shoulder, warm, soft, keepig her arms around her. She pulls a hand away, to her lap, grabbing the shirt from it and sighing. There is probably nothing in the world that she would want more than stay as she is in her warmth and smelling the alcohol and smoke in her neck, a scent that should be offensive but mixed into Angel's skin it's almost addictive - the only exception being here, with her sober.
So she does what she should do, pulling back from her and gently coaxing her arms in to the shirt, rolling it down her middle and past it - long enough to nearly be as long as the skirt she is wearing. She very meticulously unclasps the stockings from her skirt, rolling it down her legs, slow, gently. ]
Let's just sleep, okay? Warm and comfy?
[ And tomorrow we can all pretend nothing happened. Gently getting the skirt off of her as she give her a small kiss to her cheek - innocent and nice. ]
[ It seems to finally defeat her - and she sighs, going obedient as the shirt goes over her head. Holds still for it, letting her tug it down her body and squirming somewhat helpfully as stockings come undone.
She might just be pouting though. ]
Yeah... [ it isn't the kind of warm she had been aiming for, that was for sure. As soon as she's done, Angel flops back onto her back. Lifting her hips to tug her skirt off for herself. Flinging it away somewhere into the corner of the room.
Nope, she's definitely pouting. Her final revenge no doubt would be the mess of make-up she's going to leave on Parker's pillow by the time it's morning. ]
[ It is nothing new. Parker can sigh a little bit more freely when Angel relents, accepts this fate, and still, she does feel a little pang of regret in not taking this opportunity because while it is the right thing to do, she kind of wishes it wasn't. But this isn't a good start to anything, not with Angel like this, and she knows in the morning she wouldn't feel okay with it - with herself.
Parker gets the skirt off and lets it on the floor, looking up at her laying on the bed with a pout. It gets her a little smile. Parker pushes herself up to crawl on to the bed. Slips an arm under Angel's waist and very surprisingly easily pulls her up and on to the bed to rest her on the pillow she had been using moments ago. ]
You can stay over for the weekend, if you want.
[ She says as she rolls on to the other side, where the bed is pushed against the wall, flopping down next to her, and pulls the covers over them, tucking them close and up to Angel's shoulders. ]
[ It's not enough for her to just lay beside her - it never is. She's a hungry thing. All sharp teeth and soft sighs. Turning around to her the second Parker settles in beside her. A rag doll otherwise, she's loose-limbed and comfortable. Wriggling around in the blankets until she finds where Parker is beside her and drapes across her. Burying against her hair and bringing her leg up and over Parker's own. ]
'Kay.
[ It's what she wants, after all. To not see Jack, or see him as little as she can. Tries not to let Parker knows. Sex and alcohol are better past times than talking about just why she prefers this over being in her own house. Well, in part, she also just happens to like this - closeness, just for itself, just having Parker to herself.
Sighs out, breath warm against her ear. ]
Last chance before I fall asleep.
[ It's murmured sleepily against her ear, but she rolls her hips against her. Cold otherwise, but where her legs hooked over Parker's it's not hard to feel where she's warm. Where right now, she'd be nothing but slick and easy to the touch. Moan oh so sweetly in her ear over it.
But it's ruined a second later when she yawns. Huge and wide. ]
[ There is no protest when Angel doesn't lay still; Parker doesn't mind. Normally, she would, get annoyed, but there isn't anyone else that she lets this close. She likes her warmth, her scent, even when muddled with cigarettes and alcohol. Always so easy in drinking it in. And she's cold, makes her skin crawl even under the blankets, but doesn't move away. Let's her get comfortable and closes her eyes, before opening again when Angel moves like that.
Parker makes a small noise in the back of her throat, a groan, and sighs, moving a hand to her hip. Softly grasping at it so she stops, trying to ignore the way her breath tickles so warmly against her ear. Huffs through her nose.
And it would be the easiest thing in the world. To turn up to her. It's what she wants to do the most. Just lean in and kiss her, press her lips to hers, soft at first, rolling a crescendo. Slip her fingers through her hair, slip against her while tasting her lips. It would be so easy to do it. But it would be nothing at all, because she wasn't sober and she was too easy to it. She doesn't want easy. She wants real.
So instead she doesn't, gently peeling her leg off of hers, fingers so gentle against her cold skin as she pushes softly on it. Brings it up to brush against her shaved head, thumb petting back and forth on it. ]
[ and that's all it takes, the next breath, and she's out like a light. Doesn't even hear what she says before she's asleep on her shoulder, her head tucked against her, draped over her heavily.
Doesn't move like that for the rest of the night, sleeping heavy like drinking lets her. Bad habits for a wretched child, but she can't find anything bad about it when she gets to curl up next to Parker, all soft and docile and utterly sure she's wanted. ]
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no subject
And then she ended up catching herself laying on Angel's lap when they were out on the park and liking way too much her fingers in her hair. And her presence in her studio. And generally just being around her.
And it really is not fair when she is like that, because Parker is far too weak for it. She knows there isn't a fully sober decision from her right now, but for a split second, she tilts her head for Angel to have an easier access as her lips mark her skin with lipstick. Takes all of her strength to just stand there quietly, fingers gripping into the counter, biting her lower lip.
The microwave pings, and Parker opens her eyes slowly, leaning back to watch Angel. She is glad the apartment is a little too dark so she can hide her face in it. Her leg bumps gently against Angel's, skin on skin, one warmer than the other. Her voice is soft and small. ]
Angel, what are you doing?
no subject
Saying thank you. I don't want you to think I'm not grateful.
[ Her head goes lower, all sweetly teasing along her collar-bone until she bites, sharp and quick and giggling. The soft press of her tongue against skin and the roll up and into her. There are goosebumps on her skin with the cold, her pale skin stark against the sheer black of her bra. More lace - she seems to have endless amounts of it and - she looks happy to taking it off too up until - ]
Pizza's done. [ and she's gone the next second, going straight to the microwave to get it open. Hungry, is apparently what's taking up the other part of her mind. ]
no subject
It's one thing, hugs and sleeping with her head buried against her chest and craving for her fingers in her hair. It's another to feel a pleasant hot pulse between her legs from kisses and bites.
Parker gasps at the sudden distance, knuckles turned white from the sheer strength she had been holding on to the counter. Swallows dryly as Angel moves away, left a bit of a mess. Stares at her with half-open mouth, before hurrying in crossing her arms over her chest in embarrassment.
Shit. Not good. ]
Uhm. Yeah. Enjoy.
[ Parker is just going stand there not moving for a moment. ]
no subject
Turning back to her, she's sucking off the oil from her thumb in a slow gesture. Catching her eye with it. A warm lick against her own lips. ]
Were you studying today?
no subject
She does smile a little watching Angel eat, because it's her favourite kind and she has stopped ordering any other nowadays. Keeps it saved in the fridge for her and her late night visits. Not so big of a smile when she moves away and has to try very hard to not to lower her eyes to the skirt that's more a belt than a skirt. Attempts to. Doesn't really go all too well.
She straightens up as Angel walks to the bed and has to force herself to pretend she's not seeing what she's seeing or how adorable her lace always is (she thinks she has seen that before, one off-handed remark when they were shopping, telling her it would look good on her) and shrugs. ]
Just an essay. [ She finally pushes herself off the counter to the bed, tugging at the covers to make it more inviting. ] You done with yours?
no subject
No. Who cares though? I can finish it in the morning.
[ because she's smart, she knows she's smart, she's smarter than half the people she talks to and she worked that out young. An essay would take her a couple of hours, tops. Not that she didn't take it seriously, but it's hard to care about a course that Jack had picked for her. ]
no subject
I don't doubt it.
[ She sits down on the bed again, rubbing her eyes tiredly. Less tired than she was before Angel came knocking though. Maybe if she forces some sleep on herself she'll forget the warmth in her belly. ]
You need anything else?
no subject
All preening, demanding, expecting. ]
No. [ the red smear of lipstick at the corner of her mouth, and shiver of cold on her skin that wants to be warmed away. ] Just you.
no subject
She opens a drawer from a cupboard, pulls out a clean workout shirt, large and comfortable, and walks back to Angel. ]
Okay. [ Like she's saying yes to her request. She kneels in front of her, setting the shirt on Angel's lap, and starts to undo the heels from her. ] You need sleep.
no subject
I like it when you make me tired.
[ She wiggles her toes inside her stockings against Parker's shoulder. Her leg arching up in a way that's nothing but inviting. ]
no subject
Which is hard to do. ]
You don't know what you're saying.
[ And it's harder and harder for Parker to peel away from her, but she has to. She wishes she did know what she was saying, and everything would be so much easier. Doesn't help that Angel's leg is resting on her shoulder, or that she's wearing that short skirt or the pretty lacy bra. ]
no subject
Don't I?
[ She wriggles closer. Squirming up against her that's the invitation of the cheap perfume and cigarettes and thick smell of alcohol. Her, all warm, all giving she'll be nothing but pliant and giving and - if Parker would just reach a little closer, it's all hers. ]
no subject
No. [ She gently sets her hands on her sides, keeping her steady. Her skin is warmer than Angel's by far and she automatically spreads her fingers to try to warm her up. Presses her shoulders against hers, keeping her close. Slips her arms around her waist then, fingers against the shoulder blades as she noses her shoulder shyly. ] And I can't because I want you to know.
[ She needs her to. Can't do it otherwise. ]
no subject
Rather as Parker's fingers work up, her head goes back in open invitation. The exposed line of her body that she can feel the slide of her hands on her bare skin that leaves her toes curling up at how good that feels. The moan is guiltless, honest, when it works it's way up her body. Responding to tone more than words that say that this isn't happening.
When she blinks her eyes open, they're dazed with it, heavy-lidded that says just to how much she is getting further and further gone. Either to being touched or to the drink, either way. One makes the other easy. ]
no subject
So she does what she should do, pulling back from her and gently coaxing her arms in to the shirt, rolling it down her middle and past it - long enough to nearly be as long as the skirt she is wearing. She very meticulously unclasps the stockings from her skirt, rolling it down her legs, slow, gently. ]
Let's just sleep, okay? Warm and comfy?
[ And tomorrow we can all pretend nothing happened. Gently getting the skirt off of her as she give her a small kiss to her cheek - innocent and nice. ]
no subject
She might just be pouting though. ]
Yeah... [ it isn't the kind of warm she had been aiming for, that was for sure. As soon as she's done, Angel flops back onto her back. Lifting her hips to tug her skirt off for herself. Flinging it away somewhere into the corner of the room.
Nope, she's definitely pouting. Her final revenge no doubt would be the mess of make-up she's going to leave on Parker's pillow by the time it's morning. ]
no subject
Parker gets the skirt off and lets it on the floor, looking up at her laying on the bed with a pout. It gets her a little smile. Parker pushes herself up to crawl on to the bed. Slips an arm under Angel's waist and very surprisingly easily pulls her up and on to the bed to rest her on the pillow she had been using moments ago. ]
You can stay over for the weekend, if you want.
[ She says as she rolls on to the other side, where the bed is pushed against the wall, flopping down next to her, and pulls the covers over them, tucking them close and up to Angel's shoulders. ]
no subject
'Kay.
[ It's what she wants, after all. To not see Jack, or see him as little as she can. Tries not to let Parker knows. Sex and alcohol are better past times than talking about just why she prefers this over being in her own house. Well, in part, she also just happens to like this - closeness, just for itself, just having Parker to herself.
Sighs out, breath warm against her ear. ]
Last chance before I fall asleep.
[ It's murmured sleepily against her ear, but she rolls her hips against her. Cold otherwise, but where her legs hooked over Parker's it's not hard to feel where she's warm. Where right now, she'd be nothing but slick and easy to the touch. Moan oh so sweetly in her ear over it.
But it's ruined a second later when she yawns. Huge and wide. ]
no subject
Parker makes a small noise in the back of her throat, a groan, and sighs, moving a hand to her hip. Softly grasping at it so she stops, trying to ignore the way her breath tickles so warmly against her ear. Huffs through her nose.
And it would be the easiest thing in the world. To turn up to her. It's what she wants to do the most. Just lean in and kiss her, press her lips to hers, soft at first, rolling a crescendo. Slip her fingers through her hair, slip against her while tasting her lips. It would be so easy to do it. But it would be nothing at all, because she wasn't sober and she was too easy to it. She doesn't want easy. She wants real.
So instead she doesn't, gently peeling her leg off of hers, fingers so gentle against her cold skin as she pushes softly on it. Brings it up to brush against her shaved head, thumb petting back and forth on it. ]
Shut up, Angel. Go to sleep.
no subject
Doesn't move like that for the rest of the night, sleeping heavy like drinking lets her. Bad habits for a wretched child, but she can't find anything bad about it when she gets to curl up next to Parker, all soft and docile and utterly sure she's wanted. ]